"When peace like a river attendeth my way,
when sorrows like sea billows roll
whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
it is well, it is well, with my soul."
This has long been a favorite hymn of mine, but never has it been so applicable as it has during my fostering journey. Foster care is filled with many ups, downs, twists, turns, tunnels, and unexpected loops that literally turn your world upside down. To say that this journey is not for the faint of heart us an understatement indeed. But if you take the risk of joining the ride and can hold on, you'll be amazed at how it will strengthen your faith in ways you never imagined!
There are days and weeks when the fostering journey is more like a river...moving along at a predictable speed and path. The days become almost normal as you follow your normal routine and maybe you forget about that bend up ahead that culminates in a waterfall dumping into an ocean of unknown. You are enjoying the gentle ride of the familiar until all of a sudden, the path takes an unexpected turn. A child shares a secret previously undisclosed. You find out a birth mom of a current foster child is nearing the end of her pregnancy...and the caseworker wants to know if you would take the sibling. A former foster child comes back into care and they want to know if you can make room for this child...or your heart breaks because you can't. A family member is discovered and suddenly you are no longer needed. A birth parent thinks they will get the upper hand in their case if they falsely accuse you of abuse and an investigator shows up at your door. A birth parent you thought you were successfully mentoring suddenly disappears without a trace. At one point or another in my fostering journey, each of these events has happened (sometimes more than once) and the sea billows begin to roll.
But just like when Jesus calmed the raging waves in the Bible, He calms my raging emotions that feel as powerful as a hurricane. All I have to do is ask. If I try to make sense of all this in my own strength and understanding, I come up short every time. But if I remember that all is well, then God calms my emotional storm and restores my peace. There may still be things I do not understand. There may still be things I do not like. But my emotions are no longer raging because a peace that passes all understanding suddenly takes over my soul and once again I can say, "It is well with my soul." Romans 8:28 reminds us that all things work together for our good. It does not say that all things will BE good. In fact, in John 16:33, Jesus reminds us that we will experience trouble in this world. But the good, the bad, and the ugly will all work together to the good that God has planned for us. The troubles we face change us and remind us that we are not the center of the universe. Troubles and trials, if we use these opportunities correctly, will drive us to our knees seeking God's plan. When we follow that plan, we find peace. With that peace, we realize that all really is well.
